Count chemicals, not calories.
Okay in all seriousness, I have a question. What the fuck is guar gum – and why is it in everything?
Hi invisible internet friends and mom! Just checking in – day 5 and still eating only mud, no blood (gross, sorry). Honestly, so far it’s a little easier than I expected… That being said, I’ve really only eaten chickpeas and oatmeal so far – and in the 5 days I’ve been vegan I’ve gone to the grocery store 11 times… but still, easy!
So, there was a really nice guy at the grocery store who was there every time I came back. The first two trips back I think he took pity on me. In his friendly customer service voice, he said things like (insert big cheesy but welcomed fake smile), “oh boy, haha, back again?” followed by, “haha, we’re going to get you an application next!” But, by the fourth trip to the store in the same afternoon, he was whispering to a coworker and pointing at me. I can only imagine what he was saying, “there’s the psycho looney tune who wont leave.” Listen, I wouldn’t be here for the umpteenth time if food labels didn’t need a key, atlas and a dictionary to understand! Fucking guar gum.
One of the things I’ve noticed the most, is I find people asking me about eating vegan way more than I find myself talking about it. We all know the stereotype:
But in all reality – I find people ask, then they need to explain to me why they’re not, or why they couldn’t or wouldn’t consider giving up meat. It’s really strange how many people in just the 5 days I’ve been doing this have needed to rationalize their meat eating to me. My friends who have allergies will kill me for saying this – but sometimes I feel like that would make it easier. Not the diet itself, but the questions you get. If your answer is “because the poor baby cows” or “because I don’t want cancer” they turn into protein experts and explain why they could never and would never give it up. When you say, “I’m lactose intolerant” or “I’m allergic to gluten,” you get the, “oooooh poor thing” but then they leave you alone. Listen, I just want to eat my chickpeas in peace and not kill things, ok?
But really, I’m making it much more dramatic than it is – most of the people asking just know me well enough to know it’s a 50/50 on whether or not this is a fad or the real deal. I mean, lets be honest – I’m no expert on having the perfect lifestyle, but I am the expert at wanting it.
Ask anyone I know – I always have a new thing I’m going to get into, a new idea that’s going to change my life, a new hobby that I can’t believe I lived without for so long. My poor coworker, who tolerates all my ideas – and is decent enough to be a great listener and tell me I’m crazy in the same sentence – she’s heard it all. My obsession with Barre (that lasted two months), my brilliant plan to open an antique shop (I still think that’s a great idea), about the lake house I’m going to own someday (still the plan), about this diet I’m trying, that diet i tried, this new must-do workout craze, that part time job I’m going to take, this food I’m going to quit, that 8 mile run I took, and those blisters on my feet… like I said, she’s heard it all. So when I told her I was going vegan, as always she listened, humored me, and then told me I was crazy.
And she’s not wrong for thinking that – I’m not foolish enough to think that because I made it 5 days that, that means I’ve got this the distance. But something really does feel different this time… When I finally quit smoking, it wasn’t the first time I tried to quit before – but it was the first time I truly didn’t want to be a smoker anymore… so I wasn’t. I don’t want to be a meat eater anymore, so I wont be.
So I want to tell you about some things that have happened in the last 5 days. Maybe they’re in my head, maybe they’re real – but they’re real enough for me. I have chronic back pain – like fuck you, wakes up in the middle of the night, would rather die kind of back pain (slight exaggeration… but only slight). Last night I was lying in bed, just watching some Planet Earth, because I’m cliche as fuck, and I shot up and literally said outloud, “holy shit, my back doesn’t hurt.” Like… I didn’t feel it going away – and didn’t even realize it was gone, until I went to go into my routine of roll around until I’m comfortable enough, when I realized it! Coincidence? Food related? I don’t know… but hell yes.
Another thing, that 3pm crash that I get EVERY day, when I start fantasizing about my sexy espresso machine at home… yup, you guessed it – GONE! I am still drinking a cup of coffee – aka a triple espresso with a splash of almond milk (I fucking love espresso) – every morning, but that was already my norm and I’d still crash. This morning, I taught spin at 6am, got to work at 8:30am, and here I am at 4pm, dandy as can be! That post lunch, after food nap I always needed – I need not more!
All in all – I’m feeling good, day 5 with no slowing down, and I’m excited about food and what to make next – I’d say so far so good! So I’ll leave you for some vegan food for thought: Am I A vegan, do I EAT vegan, am I GOING vegan… how do I say it?
This was my first vegan dinner on night one – and it wasn’t half bad!
KEEP READING! Onto -> “My journey to vegan – Day Nine“
Back to “My Journey to vegan – Day One“